Do Not Apologize for Having Loud Sex
By ?relatively harmless,? I mean that sex noises don?t actively injure or oppress anyone. They may be awkward; overhearers are forced to think about sex at a moment when they would prefer not to. (Or worse, when they, too, are having sex, in which case they suddenly feel like they?re taking part in an orgy with Bob from 3A.) Like an accidental glimpse of an acquaintance?s naked body, overheard orgasms may be seared in the mind.
Nevertheless, the overhearers? inconvenience is relatively minor. As far as noisy neighbors go, sexually noisy neighbors are really not that intrusive. The noisy part lasts only a few minutes, which is more than can be said for some colicky babies and barking dogs I have known. (To say nothing of the ongoing jackhammer renovations in the building outside my window as we speak.) But to tell the noisy-sex-havers to remove an entire genre of sex from their repertoire in the privacy of their own homes due to some third party?s minor discomfort is a significant burden. And so the onus is on the overhearing-sex-listener to deal with it. You can dull the noise by turning on a radio, putting in earplugs, or making some noise of your own. You can simply ignore it for a couple minutes. Neighbors who throw noisy parties are generally allowed a few hours of indulgence. Shouldn?t vocal sex-havers be afforded a few minutes?